SAINT AGATHA  - SAINT JAMES CHURCH

3728 Chestnut Street    Philadelphia, PA. 19104

Phone: 215-386-9732,   Fax: 215-386-5899,    E-Mail: info@SaintsAJ.org

Website: www.SaintsAJ.org

Marriage Preparation Conferences (“Pre-Cana”)

Pre-Cana conferences provide an engaged couple the opportunity to discuss their wedding - and their future marriage - with other, faith-filled, knowledgeable couples. 

Couples are encouraged to register for and attend these conferences as soon as possible for the following reasons:

·         People have found that Pre-Cana has helped their overall wedding marriage preparation.

·         Pre-registration for these conferences is recommended because they fill up quickly.

·         Pre-Cana conferences are a major part of your preparation for marriage and are thus absolutely required.

·         The Family Life Office is now publishing the Archdiocese’s Marriage Preparation program schedules exclusively on line. Priests and couples can access the schedule and registration form at http://archphila.org/evangelization/famlife/marriage.htm#couples.

Several options concerning Pre-Cana conferences are offered during the year:

1.      Locally, the Newman Center at Penn hosts a single Day Marriage Preparation program twice a year, in the spring and fall.  This day involves a Saturday and the preceding Friday Evening. Please call the Parish Office at 215-386-9732 to inquire about these days.

2.      For couples who are not members of St. AJ parish, your home parish should have brochures containing the dates and times when these conferences are offered in their area.

3.      The Archdiocese of Philadelphia sponsors Pre-Cana conferences at other locations throughout the Archdiocese. Information can be obtained at the Archdiocese of Philadelphia, The St. AJ priest handling your marriage can also provide you with information about these Archdiocesan Pre-Cana Sessions

4.      Finally, the Archdiocese also provides an excellent alternative to their regular program called the Engaged Encounter Weekend.  This is a more intense and certainly more beneficial retreat for those desiring a deeper spiritual and interpersonal experience.  For details, please contact the Family Life Office of the Archdiocese of Philadelphia [610-660-9002] or consult the above web site.

Prenuptial Investigation (“P.N.I.”)

The PNI premarital questionnaire is basically a data intake form that accomplishes the following:

·         An official document recording the relevant data concerning your wedding (kept at the parish where your wedding is performed for future reference).

·         Verification that there are no impediments to your marriage (for example, currently married or ordained).

·         Testimony that the couple intends to enter a faithful, permanent, and fruitful (procreative) marital union.

You should call the priest approximately THREE months prior to your wedding date to make an appointment for the PNI.  Please remember to make this contact since the priest cannot be responsible for calling you.  This session is also a time to:

·         Expedite any other paper work,

·         Answer further questions,

·         Begin the preparation of your marriage liturgy if you have not already done so.

Planning Your Wedding Liturgy

Couples are welcome and encouraged to become involved in the planning of their wedding.  There are many ways to become involved in the preparation of your marriage liturgy.

1.      You may select your Scripture Readings.  There are three: an Old Testament reading, a New Testament epistle, and a Gospel.

2.      You may select Readers.  One reader can do both the 1^st reading (Old Testament) and the 2^nd reading (New Testament) or you can choose two readers for each of the two readings.  You may select a third reader to do the general intercessions if you desire.  The expectation is that these readers have experience and expertise as official, church lectors and can adequately proclaim the Word of God.

3.      You may select the Liturgical Music for your service. [See the "MUSIC" section below.]

4.      Other, simple ways to involve people in your celebration include:

-          Offertory procession (no more than 4 people)

-          Preparation of the marriage booklet

-          Greeters

-          Clean-up crew

             Please feel free to discuss options and appropriateness with the priest.

5.      Special Note: "Unity Candle” is not an appropriate nor permissible symbol at a Catholic Wedding liturgy. If the unity candle ceremony has meaning for you, consider utilizing it at your reception.

Music and Vocal Accompaniment

Music is a vital part of the marriage celebration.  The parish does not employ a "parish organist" or "parish vocalists."  The musicians and vocalists who assist at regular parish liturgies on weekends throughout the year are all volunteers. Various Music ministers who regularly serve at our Sunday liturgies can provide music and vocal accompaniment at your wedding.

The priest will provide you with names and contact information of those who are willing and competent to provide this service. Since it is your responsibility to contact musicians/vocalists for your wedding liturgy, you are certainly welcome to approach them and request their assistance and participation in making arrangements for music.

Fees are negotiated individually with musicians and vocalists. Couples are expected to compensate them as per arrangement.

Flowers

Couples make their own arrangements with the florist. If there is another wedding that day, typically one bride may want to contact the other bride to discuss the possibility of “splitting the cost” of the church flowers if they can agree on mutually acceptable arrangements.

The traditional "runner" is also obtainable from the florist, if you choose to use it at your wedding.  The center aisle in St. Agatha-St. James church is 95 feet.

Pictures and Video

Photographers and videographers are welcome to record your ceremony. It is recommended that any media personnel contact the celebrating priest BEFORE the wedding day to discuss proper procedures, boundaries, expectations and concerns.

Remember – this is the celebration of a religious sacrament in sacred space. You are not renting space in a social hall. Hired photographers and/or videographers are expected to conduct themselves in a reverent, courteous and professional manner.  This involves, among other things:

·         Being on time.

·         Dressing appropriately in professional manor.  Dark colors are preferred.

·         A minimum of motion and noise throughout the church area.

·         A minimum use of flash equipment and lighting.

·         No overbearing, distracting or obstructive equipment.

·         Absolutely NO entree into the sanctuary area.

If there are no weddings or other services in the church after yours, you are welcome to remain after the ceremony with your photographer, and take whatever pictures you desire.  If, however, there is a service after yours, you will not be able to come back into the church after your ceremony.  

Altar Servers

The parish can try to provide one of our university students to serve as an acolyte (“Altar Server”) at your wedding Mass.  You are welcome to provide your own altar server[s] if you wish. In this case, kindly inform the priest.

Rehearsal

·         The rehearsal is usually scheduled during the week of the wedding. Please arrange with the priest for a date and time.

·         Rehearsals typically take 30 - 45 minutes.  Please plan around that time period.

·         It is extremely inconsiderate and unacceptable to be late for the rehearsal (See Addendum on Lateness).  Be aware that because of additional parish duties, the priest will begin the rehearsal on time regardless of whether all members of the bridal party are present or not.  Those missing can be "briefed" on their responsibilities by others.

·         The following should be present at the rehearsal:

o        Bride and groom.

o        Person "giving away the bride."

o        Members of the bridal party.

o        Ushers [if other than members of the bridal party].

o        Readers.

o        Gift bearers.

o        Any other individuals taking part in the liturgy. 

o        Photographers and musicians are also welcome to familiarize themselves with he church environment.

Permanent Deacons

 Any validly ordained Permanent Deacon you have invited to your wedding is welcome to participate in your wedding liturgy and function as a deacon, if you wish. He should contact the officiating priest to discuss his involvement.

Visiting Non-Catholic Clergy.

Any non-Catholic Clergy that you have invited to your Wedding Liturgy are welcome to participate in the liturgy in compliance with Archdiocesan guidelines. Ministers and Clergy you have invited may already be familiar with these guidelines but he/she is welcome to contact the officiating priest to discuss how he or she may be involved  

Sacrament of Reconciliation

Part of a Catholic's preparation to "properly" celebrate the sacrament of Matrimony involves proper disposition to the sacraments of Eucharist and Reconciliation. Don't "overlook" your need to celebrate the Sacrament of Reconciliation as part of your preparation for marriage. Confessions will NOT be heard on the rehearsal night. Those in need of the Sacrament should avail themselves beforehand at a more appropriate and conducive time.

Important "Do’s and Don'ts"

·         Do be discreet about the number of bridesmaids and groomsmen in the wedding party.  The primary symbol of this ceremony is you, the bride and groom. Too many bridesmaids and groomsmen may obscure what you are trying to celebrate and “junk up” what is intended to be a refined, tasteful ceremony. More in this case may not be better, but merely turns a procession into a parade. Find other creative ways to involve family and friends in your celebration. 

·         DON'T BE LATE!  It is NOT socially acceptable for the bride, or anyone else to be late.  [For the rehearsal or for the wedding.]

·         Don't throw rice, confetti, bird seed, flowers, etc. in the vestibule or outside. Balloons are environmentally insensitive. Bubbles could be considered by some to be childish.

·         Don't carry on a running conversation with each other during the ceremony.  As the bride and groom, you will be in a prominent place in the sanctuary and very visible to the congregation. Your demeanor and participation in the liturgy is important. The words, actions and meaning of the Mass or Marriage Ceremony have special significance for you and it is important that you be attentive.

·         Don't involve "little" children in the bridal party as ring bearer and flower girl if they are "too" young.  Very small children are "cute" but extremely unpredictable, distracting or even problematic.  It is not fair for someone, usually someone in the bridal party, to have to mind a bored, confused, crying, or unruly child while trying to join in the meaningful celebration of your wedding.

·         Do clean up behind you.  St. Agatha-St. James cannot afford to retain a maintenance person or sacristan to clean up after weddings. Consider assigning someone who is looking to help out with the responsibility of cleaning up immediately after your wedding.

·         The only animals that are allowed in church are Seeing Eye dogs.

·         Please read carefully the Addendum below on lateness

Revised: Advent, 2006

Revised: Pentecost, 2007

Revised September 2009

Addendum - Lateness...

Our definitive policy is: we will not allow lateness on your part to interfere with the legitimate time commitments of others! 

Usually when a ceremony is marred by lateness, it involves the bride and brides’ maids or photographers.  Therefore, there are some things you can and should do to avoid being late:

1.      Know that it is not socially acceptable or expected that the bride be late. On the contrary, deliberate lateness is rude and insensitive to your guests and all who are involved with your wedding or who have made sacrifices of time and effort to be punctual for you. 

2.      Be sure to instruct all those people who can make you late on your wedding day that you expect and require them to be ON TIME. 

3.      Reinforce this message especially with the photographer who comes to your home before you leave for the church. Carefully plan with the photographer to insure enough time to take the necessary pictures without interfering with your time schedule.

Please be aware that lateness may jeopardize the quality of your Wedding Mass or Ceremony. 

All the participants at your wedding: priest, musicians, vocalists, have serious, professional time commitments involving your wedding and in addition to your wedding.  If you jeopardize those time commitments by your lateness, it will be necessary for the priest to “adjust” your celebration appropriately. In other words, wedding ceremonies that you meticulously planned for months may be "cut short" or abbreviated by the priest or/and the musicians to meet prior commitments if they are put into conflict because of your lateness.  Practically, what this means is:

·         Parts of the ceremony that are planned to be sung will be recited.

·         Certain elements of the service may be eliminated completely.

·         The opportunity to take pictures in the church will be severely reduced or denied.

Please do not force us to "edit or ‘eliminate" parts of your wedding because you were late. We apologize for stating this so strongly, but previous experience and inconsideration have made this necessary.  If you have any questions or concerns about what is being stated here about lateness, don’t hesitate to seek further clarification from the priest.